by Greg Hilton | Sep 13, 2024 | Good Stuff, Knowledge Bomb, SOCO Members, Why We Hustle
Cofounder Greg Hilton shares his take on the “rules of engagement” for working with others. 😂 😭 😍
People: Can’t Work With Them, Can’t Succeed Without Them
When’s the last time you got something big done all by yourself? It happens, but it’s rare. Why? Because we’re social creatures? And big, hard, scary things are best done with others. .
I’ve spent my professional life in client services, nearly 12 years (whaaat?) building the SOCO Community, 10+ years serving clients at Period Three and nearly 20 years working to build a stronger, more connected entrepreneurial community in my adopted home state of South Carolina (particularly in Columbia, SC). I’ve seen every kind of human and personality. I’ve worked with stellar ones and really despicable ones.
We’re All In The People Business
I’ve been thinking a lot how so much of my success can be linked back to working with people I really trust and strong relationships. If you look back at your most successful interactions with others, you’ll notice patterns and commonality. Over time, I’ve learned to try and leverage a set of values or rules whenever I work with others.
The 10 Immutable Laws of Working With Others
Here’s my take on how to find success in working with other people, whether as a boss, a client, a partner or a collaborateur (or collaboratrice).
#1: Live The Golden Rule (Even When Other’s Don’t)
Regardless of how people treat you, do your best to treat them the way you want to be treated. I’ve found that if you give it out (in whatever form), you’ll get it back more often than not. But, It’s your value…not necessarily everyone else’s
#2: Boundaries Are Table Stakes
Boundaries are absolutely REQUIRED to have a healthy and productive relationship with someone. But, it’s on you if you don’t communicate and enforce those boundaries.
#3: Clarity Is Kindness
I can’t tell you how many times I’ve seen small miscommunications end up turning into major issues down the line. You want to get more out of people? Communicate clearly. Be clear. Set clear expectations.
#4: Accountability is Another Love Language
Everyone talks a good game, but I’ve found that almost everyone benefits from having a little accountability in their lives. Most of us struggle to be accountable for ourselves. So, help the folks in your circle honor their commitments b/c you care about them. If you business partner isn’t living up to their end of the bargain, it is your OBLIGATION to have that painful conversation with them. #sorrynotsorry
#5: Behavior is a Language
“Watch What They Do, Not What They Say” is a classic line that is so so so very true. Work with people that actually speak with their actions. Hat tip to Ley Linder on this one, who’s taught me a ton about behavioral analysis.
#6: Shared Values Are More Important Than Ever
You can work with people that might not share your perspective on things. Hell that’s healthy and can create some amazing results (in creative work for example). But, I think it’s hard to work with people (like in the trenches work) with whom you don’t share some fundamental commonality in values.
#7: Seek To Understand
To get the most out of people, try to understand what drives and motivates them. You’re likely to get a much better outcome having this knowledge in hand. And remember, every single person you work with at some stage in your relationship is going through some stuff that’s rocking their world.
#8: Avoid Selfish People
Actively avoid those that don’t put other’s needs first. I don’t mind “enlightened self-interest”, but there are those people who cannot help but figure out what THEY can get out of the situation first. That doesn’t lead to long-term trust (or results).
#9: Share Ideas Freely
Some folks want to lead. Some folks want to follow. But almost everyone wants to be a part of something meaningful. So, be the person that drops big ideas that inspire people to think and act differently.
#10: Be Kind
Just be kind people. Don’t let people take advantage of you, but put kindness into the world.
Speaking of Teams… 🏕️ 🤝🏽 🙌
Looking to crank up the ole’ collaboation? SOCO is a great kickstarter for you or your team. From workspace, to social/professional networking and peer mentoring groups…we’re building a community purpose built to support ambitious working professionals like you. Hope you’ll join us today! And don’t forget about our fabulous meeting rooms that are designed to help your team crush more meetings.
by Greg Hilton | Aug 12, 2024 | Good Stuff, Knowledge Bomb, SOCO Members, Why We Hustle
Cofounder Greg Hilton shares his take on the 6 kinds of people you need on your entrepreneurial (or professional journey).
Go It Alone, At Your Peril!
Building something awesome can be a super lonely road.
But, that’s your own fault because it doesn’t have to be. You can go it alone, but that’s a: stupid 👎 and b: unlikely to get you where you want to go 🙃. It’s all about your support tribe, your inspirations, your accountability partners and the people you learn from. For years, I was enamored by the idea that I was a rogue agent pushing against a machine that I didn’t believe in working against the grain to create something different. This led me to think I could do it on my own and I didn’t need help (it also resulted in underperformance if I’m being honest). I’m thankful to have “evolved” from that state of mind with the help of some coaching and some social support.
Who’s In Your Village?
I think there are 5 kinds of people you need to have on your journey to do big things and make an impact. We’ll go through each of them and hit us up on the socials or in the blog comments if we’ve missed anyone major?
#1: The mama (figure)
She (or he) doesn’t even know what you do, but supports you 100%. We all need someone who NEVER gives up on us and supports even our wildest ideas and ambitions, regardless of what they are.
Advice: Check in regularly with them…especially when you’re having a bad day. They are that dose of sunlight you need on the dark days.
#2: The (Keepin’ It Real) Life Partner
They believe in you, but have to live with you every day. They might not understand what you’re sacrificing or going through, but a lot of times you’re doing it for them. They’re a litmus test for your mental and emotional well-being. Let’s face it, if you’re stressed at work, you’re not checking that sh*t at the door as well as you think you are.
Advice: Keep them informed and don’t forget to share the wins too (because your daily updates can get a little negative sometimes).
#3: The Peer(s)
They’re on the path you’re walking, maybe a little ahead, maybe a little behind…but they understand the journey. And that’s the key. They’ve been in the trenches and your struggles are theirs. There is incredible comfort in knowing you’re not alone. Hat tip to Benjamin Culbreth for noting that this group can be super casual and social and that that’s important to the fabric of your entire journey.
Advice: If you’re not meeting and talking regularly with a group of professional peers, get you some. It can be informal for moral or social support, or it can get more formalized (here’s how we do it at SOCO).
#4: The Mentors
These are the folks that are way down that road. They’ve found success, they’ve made all the mistakes and they understand what’s at stake. They have the attitude of “paying it forward” and can love you enough to give you the brutal feedback you need. They open doors, they speak into you. These folks, for me, have really helped to push me forward.
Advice: Pop your head up, check on your linkedin network and find a handful of people that you’re connected to that you respect. Chances are, whether they’re in your industry or not, they have some insights to share with you. Start with coffee (you buy) and see where it goes. A formal mentoring experience is a larger investment, so test the waters first. 😎
#5: The Inspirations
These are the folks shining their light on the entire world, doing inspired or incredible things or at the very top of their games. You probably don’t know them, but you can still learn from them. They’ve found a way to set aside the small details to focus on a 10X vision (and they’ve probably chronicled that approach somewhere). They give us something to aspire towards, even if we’ll never actually meet them in person.
Advice: Find the best and the brightest out there in our planet of 8 billion souls and follow their journeys and commentary. They probably have a blog, podcast or books that can help keep you engaged and inspired.
#6: The Cheerleader (Honorable Mention)
He/she knows what you do, knows how much you pour in to it, and is always ready to encourage you to keep going.
Contributor: Naomi Sargent – Chief Operating Officer, One Spartanburg, inc
Looking For Your Village? 🏕️ 🤝🏽 🙌
Listen. Making friends or building a network as an adult can be hard. We’ve got you covered at SOCO. From workspace, to social/professional networking and peer mentoring groups…we’re building a community purpose built to support ambitious working professionals like you. Hope you’ll join us today!
by Greg Hilton | Aug 12, 2024 | Good Stuff, Knowledge Bomb, SOCO Members, Why We Hustle
SOCO Members Share Tools, Tactics and Topics They’re Exploring To Make Life and Work Improvements.
What Is “1% Every Day”?
Around here, we’re passionate about growth, development and being your best self. Whether that’s personal growth or professional growth, we really subscribe to the 1% Every Day concept. That idea simply states that if you continue to invest in yourself and improving every day (or week or month, you get the idea), that over time, you can achieve transformative change and astonishing growth.
But getting started can be scary. At first, the changes will seem insignificant. But when repeated over a long period of time, these small daily improvements add up to a significant change in just a year.
But, how do you get there? And how do you keep yourself accountable for that level of commitment? We talked with some of our members in the SOCO community about the tools, tactics and growth opportunities they’re interested in right now. There’s great wisdom in the collective, so we asked members three questions around what their learning, what their focused on and what tools they’re using to push forward and keep growing. We hope you enjoy!
#1: What book, podcast, or video has given you an “aha” moment, and why? 🔥
Too many to count! Most of my recs are entrepreneurial-focused.
1. Profit First (Mike Michalowicz)- There’s already a cult-following for this book at SOCO. Great lesson or reminder that the point of owning a company is to serve YOU.
2. I Will Teach You to Be Rich (Ramit Sethi)- a good personal finance book. Sethi is a newer Dave Ramsey, but his ideas on automating personal finances is crucial. This is my go-to gift for HS and College graduates.
3. How to Get Rich (Felix Dennis)-Ignore the cheesy title again, but you notice a trend. An entertaining read with snippets that are geared towards entrepreneurs that are building something great.
Elissa Macarin: Senior Manager of Design, DxTEL
The SOCO book club books have really been taking me out of my “comfort” reading genres and it’s been a lot of fun to just read!
I really enjoy reading Monocle magazine and frequently have “aha moments” while reading their reporting on quality of life innovations in cities around the world — not just world capitals but other cities of note. I believe they also have podcasts.
Radical Candor. I was sent the book when I started my new job. It’s about leadership and it gave me good perspective for working with others.
Christina Goodman: Owner, Visual Brand Specialist, Artvark Creative
I am always inspired by makers who share their creative process online whether they work in pottery, smithing, or leatherwork, it inspires me to do my own projects when I see other folk being creative.
#2: What’s a life-changing tool you’d recommend to fellow SOCO members?
Witt:
A thorough calendar. This rec is for the younger, disorganized crowd like me. Life and business is too busy to not write stuff down. I use Google Calendar because my whole life is essentially on G-Suite, but I like that I can look at my work and personal calendar simultaneously. My goal is to be able to block out my work calendar for the benefit of my personal calendar, and not the other way around.
Elissa:
Take naps, sometimes your brain/body just really need to shut down and reset and that’s OK!
Ernest:
Actually, I have found watching the YouTube channel Primitive Technology hugely transformative. A man working in the Australian Outback builds shelters and tools with nothing but the material found in the area. The only modern instrument is the camera he uses to record his activities. The videos are not narrated — except with captions — and they are fascinating and grew my appreciation for individual resourcefulness and commitment to salvaging and recycling material.
Jared:
Prioritizing relaxation in your daily schedule. We all need to unwind.
Christina:
I’ve been really loving brain.fm. It’s an app that uses audio frequencies to help increase focus-especially for neurodivergent folk. It’s almost annoying that it works so well. 🙂
#3: What is one area of growth you are focusing on this year, and what are you doing about it?
Witt:
My year follows the school year, so this is a great time to reflect and “manifest” those growth goals. It’s morbid, but if I died tomorrow, BrainSTEM Tutoring would die with me and come to a screeching halt. A less morbid case, if I wanted to travel to Italy next year for my best friend’s destination wedding, would I be glued to my phone/laptop the whole time, or would I be able to unplug and business things keep chugging along? My goal for growth will be to continue to expand BrainSTEM Tutoring to be the go-to STEM tutors at more colleges in the southeast while pulling myself out of the day to day.
Elissa:
Get outside A LOT more! (When it’s not a million degrees out) and just move.
Ernest:
I am slowly working on building my understanding of data science and its applications.
Jared:
Professional growth. Just became certified as an educator for personal Finance, and just learning more areas of the space in general.
Christina Goodman:
I am pushing past fear and imposter syndrome to submit my own short fiction stories to magazines for publication. I celebrate every rejection (got four in July) as a win-along-the-way.
Speaking of Growth ✨
While we’re on the subject of growth, doing your best work and generally being a bad-assed human…we think you should come find your happy (work) place with us at SOCO. We work really hard to create great workspaces filled with excellent, kind humans, chock-full of amenities like blazing wifi, bottomless coffee/tea and well appointed meeting rooms. We have coworking, fixed desk and private office options. We also have an incredible community of like-minded professionals to lean on, leverage and contribute to (that’s the fun part). Join us whydontcha?
by Greg Hilton | Jul 25, 2024 | Knowledge Bomb, SOCO Members, Why We Hustle
6 SOCO Members Share What They’ve Learned On Their Paths To Growth & Success
How Do YOU Learn and Grow?
Growth is such an interesting thing. We all want it, but few of us are willing to put in the work to achieve it. Sometimes it goes according to plan. Sometimes that “growth” smacks you upside the face because life drops a bomb on you. And on (rare) occasions, we’re fortunate enough to learn something from the people around us. So, we sat down with some SOCO members get to know them, learn what makes them tick and tease out some of the lessons they’ve learned along the way.
6 Members, 6 Paths, 6 Lessons Learned 🔥
We talked to 6 SOCO members, explore their paths to growth and asked them all the same questions:
- What Do You Do?
- What Are Some Cool Side Things You’re Into?
- What’s Your Super Power?
- What’s The Biggest Lesson You’ve Learned?
#1: Kim Andrews – Founder, Kim Andrews Coaching
Tell Us What You Do: I help nonprofit leaders to be great managers. This is typically a mix of one-on-one coaching, facilitating group learning experiences, and helping teams have hard conversations in ways that build trust and understanding.
Tell Us Some of Your Extracurriculars: Pool days with my three young kiddos and husband Brook, running and playing tennis with friends, watching bad reality TV, and reading overdue books I’ve squirreled away on my Kindle.
Tell Us Your Super Power: Showing a genuine interest in other people. I credit my wise father, who made me read How to Win Friends and Influence People in my early teens.
What’s The Biggest Lesson You’ve Learned That Has Helped You Along The Way:
Clarity and motivation follow (imperfect) action. I have to relearn this daily. I never imagined starting a business because I thought that was for people who had it ALL FIGURED OUT. Not true! As I take action and experiment, I get clearer about what works, what I enjoy, and how I’m best suited to help clients.
#2: Witt Bauknight – Owner/Operator, BrainSTEM Tutoring
Tell Us What You Do: We tutor college-level STEM courses. I build relationships and connections with students and parents.
Tell Us Some of Your Extracurriculars: I cook anything from bread to smoking BBQ. I attend USC football, basketball and baseball games. I spend time with my lovely wife, Kate.
Tell Us Your Super Power: The combination of tutoring ability, emotional intelligence, and desire to help people. All together, it leads to successful tutoring and happy stakeholders. Also optimism.
What’s The Biggest Lesson You’ve Learned That Has Helped You Along The Way:
- Ignore those that look down on your entrepreneurial path from ignorance, but listen to criticism from those with experience and knowledge.
- Go find a customer. Paying customer = proof of need and is the start to your growth journey.
- Start the journey early. The more personal obligations and people that depend on you, the scarier each leap will be.
#3: Andrew Rabuck – SVP – Community Development Division Manager, Woodforest National Bank
Tell Us What You Do: I deploy capital for Community Development purposes in the southeast: Economic Development, Affordable Housing, Small Business Loan Funds, and Community Services.
Tell Us Some of Your Extracurriculars: My most favorite thing is traveling and adventuring with Michele and the family. In between trips you can find me gardening, fermenting things from the garden, baking, hiking, doing things outdoors when it is not 1000 degrees, and spending time with friends and church family.
Tell Us Your Super Power: “Everything will be okay.” I’m super positive almost all the time.
What’s The Biggest Lesson You’ve Learned That Has Helped You Along The Way:
Say no. It’s one of the hardest lessons to learn and I’m still learning it. You will find so much freedom when you set boundaries. It’s a place where a lot of growth can occur. Also, stop and smell the roses / observe the obvious – when you pause to notice all the small things, you will be astounded by this world that God created for us, and you’ll meet some amazing people along the way.
#4: Dave Maxfield – Attorney, Author, Consultant, Cool Dude
Tell Us What You Do: Represent people in cases against banks, credit reporting agencies, debt collectors and car dealers.
Tell Us Some of Your Extracurriculars: Soccer, music, autocross, AI, Formula 1 (recently), and being a grandparent while deceiving myself into thinking I’m still 25.
Tell Us Your Super Power: Condensing a lot of information into something simple, stealing good ideas from industries that have nothing to do with law, teaching.
What’s The Biggest Lesson You’ve Learned That Has Helped You Along The Way:
That the “real goal” of working is more a feeling than any particular result, and the only three reasons to work at all is to earn a living ($), to do something that matters (meaning) and because you like it (engagement). If one of those pieces is missing, you won’t be happy at work. Beyond that, to go imperfectly in the right direction, detached from the result, and flexibly relentless. And how much sleep matters. Also, wear sunscreen kids.
#5: Kaleigh Cox – VP of Business Development and Content Operations, DxTEL
Tell Us What You Do: We help small to midsize internet service providers across North America compete with national brands with our industry-leading marketing solutions and platforms.
Tell Us Some of Your Extracurriculars: I attend and serve at Crossroads Church, am training for my first half marathon, and recently co-authored my first book, which comes out in 2025!
Tell Us Your Super Power: As a Christian, I view my work as a calling, and that compels me to do the best work I can to love others well.
What’s The Biggest Lesson You’ve Learned That Has Helped You Along The Way:
I don’t have to be afraid of confrontation. Whether I’m addressing an issue with a vendor or owning up to my own mistakes with an apology, difficult conversations—when handled with humility and honesty—are opportunities to serve everyone well.
#6: Ley Linder – Founder/Owner, Crescent Behavioral Health
Tell Us What You Do (25 words): I am a behavioral gerontologist specializing in the behavior presentations of neurocognitive disorders in people with intellectual disabilities.
Tell Us Some of Your Extracurriculars (25 words): Two years ago, I started an annual goal to spend one month a year in a foreign city/country. So far, the Netherlands is complete and Montevideo is next.
Tell Us Your Super Power (25 words): Through the lens of behavior analysis, I can explain (almost!) every behavior that you exhibit and experience in your life. I am absolutely judging you!
What’s The Biggest Lesson You’ve Learned That Has Helped You Along The Way (50 words) Go to therapy! Prioritizing my mental health has led to a pervasive and massive impact on my life. I have become present in relationships, have less stress and anxiety, and have a better work/life balance. Perhaps most importantly, I have begun to be proud of myself – which, historically, was never a consideration.
Speaking of Growth ✨
While we’re on the subject of growth, doing your best work and generally being a bad-assed human…we think you should come find your happy (work) place with us at SOCO. We work really hard to create great workspaces filled with excellent, kind humans, chock-full of amenities like blazing wifi, bottomless coffee/tea and well appointed meeting rooms. We have coworking, fixed desk and private office options. Our job is to help you do your best work and grow personally and professionally. So, get you some!
by Greg Hilton | May 10, 2024 | Featured, Good Stuff, Knowledge Bomb, Why We Hustle
How To Get Into “The Zone”, Find Peak Performance and Make Work Suck Less
Let’s Go To The Flow (State)
So, I’ve been doing creative work for years and if there’s one thing I know…it’s that there’s no better place or feeling than being in flow. For solopreneurs, self-employed individuals, and creative professionals, tapping into the elusive state of flow can be transformative. it can feel elusive or fleeting, but it doesn’t have to. In this guide, we’ll explore how understanding and harnessing flow state can revolutionize your productivity and creativity.
And if your income depends on you delivering, the stakes are high. But, we really do think you can create the conditions that lead to better outcomes and better work. So read on intrepid creator! ⛰️
Understanding Flow State
Coined by psychologist Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi, flow state is the pinnacle of focus and immersion in an activity. It’s that magical feeling of being “in the zone,” where time seems to vanish, distractions fade away, and productivity soars. But, how do you know when you’re there? You’ll know you’ve reached that nirvana when you’re experiencing any or all of the following:
- Intense Focus: You’re immersed completely in your work, shutting out distractions and honing in on the task at hand. The simplicity of being focused creates a warm bubble around you and nothing else really matters.
- Loss of Self-awareness: Experience a blissful detachment from self-consciousness and time, as you become absorbed in your work. Really tHis just means all the internal distractions have subsided or moved waaaay back in your mind.
- Effortless Action: Feel a sense of ease and fluency in your actions, where tasks seem to unfold effortlessly. Have you ever looked up from a project or skated it with a colleague and they were like “holy shit, this is a ton of work.” That’s the result when its “effortless”. I remember being in the zone on a outdoor tourism project I was working on. I pretty much mapped out and generated 50 pages of content in like 8 hours. The client couldn’t believe it.
- Timelessness: You enter a state where time becomes irrelevant, either flying by or standing still, as you remain engrossed in the present moment. We don’t recommend you miss too many drink and snack breaks, but when time is less relevant, cool things happen. I experience this timelessness in my personal life when I’m crafting outdoor furniture (a new hobby – obsession – of mine) I get so into it that I miss meals. It’s kind of magical.
- Intrinsic Motivation: You feel driven by an internal desire to excel and succeed in your endeavors. This is “embracing the challenge” with curiosity and child mind. You’ve pushed past the “I’ve got to get this done” due to some external pressure. You are in this for the craft and experience.
8 Strategies To Find, Sustain (and Revisit) Flow State 🔥
- Set Clear Goals: Define precise and attainable objectives for your projects to provide a roadmap for your efforts and maintain focus. And if you’re feeling froggy, make one of those goals to “experiment” with whatever you’re working on (see below). 🎯
- Match Challenge with Skill: Engage in tasks that leverage your abilities while presenting a moderate level of challenge to foster optimal conditions for flow. Listen. Here’s the magic. You can’t do things well that you’ve never done before so flow state happens when you’re leveraging your skills and pushing yourself just a little bit outside your comfort zone. So, My pal Gene Crawford equates this to the magic he experiences when he’s practicing martial arts. He’s put the work in for years so the flow and routine are there, but he’s taking this thing he does well and pushing himself to new limits. Sort of like the “1% every day” concept. 💪
- Minimize Distractions: Create a distraction-free workspace by silencing notifications, finding a quiet corner, and prioritizing uninterrupted work periods. To do deep work, you MUST eliminate distractions. On average distractions make anything we’re working on take 3X as long. So, do yourself a favor and turn it all off. The world will be okay and you owe it to whatever you’re working on (PS: And while you’re at it, come book one of our focus meeting rooms at SOCO – you’re welcome). 🎧
- Cultivate Deep Focus: Incorporate mindfulness practices like deep breathing and meditation into your routine to enhance concentration. This is a muscle and skill that most of us don’t have or is very weak. Stay fully present in your work, channeling your energy into the present moment to maximize focus and productivity. 🔬
Need help training your mind and body in simple ways to enter a more focused state. Tip: Try a mindfulness app like Headspace for 30 days and see how It impacts your days.
- Embrace Flow Triggers: Identify activities or rituals that consistently evoke flow state and incorporate them into your routine. Be prepared to launch, but one of my best flow triggers is when I open up Spotify and dial in the Calm Radio station. It triggers something in my brain that tells me “it’s time to focus, Greg”. Find your rituals and do them regularly before you get dialed in. 🚦
- Embrace Failure as Feedback: Listen. If you’re doing creative work (especially), better outcomes come from failure. Creating is an iterative process and you need to make time and space to experiment, fail and learn. Learn about “the child mind” and embrace this way of looking at whatever it is you’re working on. You’ll thank me for it. 💡
- Engage in Challenging Activities Regularly: Seek out opportunities that push your boundaries and expand your capabilities to strengthen your skill set. If you stay in your safe, comfortable space then you’ll have a lot of trouble creating great things. Get your mind and body comfortable being uncomfortable and you’ll unlock a lot more productivity and results. 🏋🏾♀️
- Chill Out With Rigid Structures: And maybe don’t try so hard to “architect” your perfect flow state. Here’s a great post from Dan Martin where he advocates for a less rigid approach to embracing your flow state. 🧊
Conclusion
By integrating these strategies into your regular work routine, you can cultivate an environment conducive to flow state, unlocking your full potential as a solo entrepreneur or creative professional. Embrace the journey of discovering and maintaining flow state, and enjoy the joy of doing great work again people. You’re worth it. 🫶🏽
Need a Little More Inspiration? ✨
Looking to stay in this flow state zen a little longer? Check out Gene and I’s recent conversation on the topic on The Communal Podcast here. We get into to our own personal practices, our struggles with Flow State and some tips we’ve picked up along the way.
About The Author:
Greg Hilton is the cofounder and managing partner for SOCO, SOCO is a thriving platform and community focused on supporting creators, indie workers and entrepreneurs just like you. He’s an avid outdoorsman, creator and storyteller. He’s also been self-employed and a business owner for nearly two decades and has worked with hundreds of solos, creators and entrepreneurs to help them lead better and more meaningful lives.
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